I never use it but it’s nice to know it’s there.

 

The alternative to the Royal Mail:

The guy who came second just learnt the words to John Lennon's "Imagine"

Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-da-ba

All screenshots taken from the first two minutes of  last night’s episode of The One Show.

It’s the transitions Adrian finds hard, sometimes he has to move his face with his hands.

Da… dum… da… dum… da dum da dum dadumdadum

It’s terrorfyling good

Ambition:

To one day be in the position to say to someone, in a gruff voice, “you remind me of me”.

The worst thing about growing up is having to fill in forms

Are you thinking… what we’re thinking?

The next general election feels a bit like when Germany plays Argentina at the World Cup. Does there have to be a winner?

Rawr

 
A late night doodle.
 
I think this makes it seventeen posts without a paragraph of writing in a row. Go me!

Hello the internet, I made a lady

 
Took about four hours. Click for much larger.

Political Policy Idea #6

Newspapers to exchange target markets, but maintain style, for one day a year.
 

Political Policy Idea #5

Sometimes, things other than the mind should be allowed to ‘boggle’.

Political Policy Idea #4

45 minute-long comedy programmes should actually make you laugh at least once. I’m looking at you, Michael McIntiresome’s Comedy Roadshow.

Political Policy Idea #3

Somehow the iPhone (pbuh) should be involved more in political decision-making.
 

Political Policy Idea #2

All “To Let” signs outside houses should be immediately adjusted as follows:
  

Political Policy Idea #1

Jeering in the House of Commons to be replaced by chants of “WHO THE FUCKING HELL ARE YOU?”

BBC Have Your Say: Who should pay to treat smoking-related disease?

What I would like to know is if it expensive to care for smokers who as a rule die quite young how expensive is it to care for all the non smokers who go on to live long enough to get problems associated with old age?

Or how about the people who are unable to put down their fork and end up on Dialysis at a cost of thousands of pounds a year?

John knight, Manchester

 
I know, those selfish bastards refusing to kill themselves before they become a burden. Shocking.

Most recommended comment, by the way. Shocking.

Also, my next six days: Revise, Exam, Exam, Revise, Exam, Die.

Shocking.

Chinese exam next week, this counts as revision

Original

 
I should really write something on this blog before its Official Internet Category™ becomes ‘weak Photoshopping cesspit’. I may do after exams some time.

More conspiracy bollocks, this week featuring our guest publication…

The Queen’s a lizard and there are tiny microphones in our hair